Connections
It is so mind-boggling to me that my second summer on staff with Carolina Cross Connection has already reached the halfway point. It feels like the time has flown by, yet at the same time, it feels like a few months have passed since staff training. That is what happens with CCC; the summer goes by so quickly but so much fills those three months of the summer. There are days that literally feel like a full week and you end each day entirely exhausted. But it is such a beautiful exhaustion, a soul-deep tiredness from serving the Lord and His Holy Kingdom.
This summer I am a Lead Program Coordinator at Camp Loy White and this opportunity has presented so many chances for me to grow in faith and trust in God. My job largely deals with overseeing the day-to-day in-camp activities, including worships, games, and general organization. My type-a personality and my love for organization were made for this job because so many small details go into having a smooth camp week. But while I love to plan and organize, my job has really challenged my ability to trust in the Lord's plans and provisions because I hide behind schedule, routine, and productivity. The Lord is really working in my heart in this, and I am trying to learn how to truly be still before God without worshiping the idol of control and self-reliance.
These past two camp weeks have been such a whirlwind of emotions and experiences that are so hard to put into words. This summer has been particularly challenging for me as it pertains to the condition of my heart and my personal walk with God. I have been truly blessed by a staff that loves me despite this, but I have a harder time loving myself through this struggle. All too often I am too ashamed of my wounded heart to let God's grace heal me and make a beautiful new creation out of me. I think the burdens I am still holding onto from a stressful season in my walk with God are surfacing which is never easy. But the beauty of that is CCC is a place where I am surrounded by more love and grace than anywhere else. I was reminded this past week about the reasons I love this ministry and it all comes down to one thing: connections.
I know what you are thinking, the word is in the name of our ministry, of course that is an important part of CCC. But really, I am still being blown away by how blessed my heart is by relationships I have built through CCC. These connections are exactly what are helping me define what CCC really means to me.
CCC is sitting in the home of a woman who is going through chemotherapy whose daughter is her primary care-taker. Her diminished strength and constant pain have left her feeling weak, but the true pain lies in the fact that her loss of hair has left her feeling that she is not beautiful. CCC is about sitting in her living room, simply to talk to her and remind her that she is loved and absolutely beautiful.
CCC is watching a precious six-year old boy with muscular dystrophy get to walk out of his house and play in his yard, a miracle that was made possible by a wheelchair ramp being built. It is seeing the potential he has to grow and flourish because his grandmother loves him unconditionally. It is being blessed by the simple gift of his childish joy and vivacity for life.
CCC is having the person you have always looked up to as your second dad be your camper for the first time at the same camp where he brought you to camp for the first six years ago. It is seeing that his passion for a ministry has forever changed your life and how you see God.
CCC is walking through real life with your brothers and sisters in Christ, not just the light and happy times, but the heavy, painful realities of life. It is loving each other despite our flaws and despite our different backgrounds because Christ binds our hearts together as He pours out His grace on us.
CCC is even crying in your car because you are just so overwhelmed by the day-to-day stresses of life because you know that you can call your dad and let him carry your burdens with you.
CCC is experiencing life together with a community of faith as you learn what it looks like to seek Him with passion. It is sharing laughter, pain, frustration, joy, and every emotion in between with a community that will embrace you with grace and love.
See, CCC is all about the connections, and even more, it is all about the God who makes these connections possible. It is about a God who is faithful despite my unfaithfulness, consistent despite my inconsistency, and graceful despite my limitations and shortcomings. CCC is journeying through life with others and experiencing His love in new and amazing ways no matter how messy that looks sometimes.
This summer I am a Lead Program Coordinator at Camp Loy White and this opportunity has presented so many chances for me to grow in faith and trust in God. My job largely deals with overseeing the day-to-day in-camp activities, including worships, games, and general organization. My type-a personality and my love for organization were made for this job because so many small details go into having a smooth camp week. But while I love to plan and organize, my job has really challenged my ability to trust in the Lord's plans and provisions because I hide behind schedule, routine, and productivity. The Lord is really working in my heart in this, and I am trying to learn how to truly be still before God without worshiping the idol of control and self-reliance.
These past two camp weeks have been such a whirlwind of emotions and experiences that are so hard to put into words. This summer has been particularly challenging for me as it pertains to the condition of my heart and my personal walk with God. I have been truly blessed by a staff that loves me despite this, but I have a harder time loving myself through this struggle. All too often I am too ashamed of my wounded heart to let God's grace heal me and make a beautiful new creation out of me. I think the burdens I am still holding onto from a stressful season in my walk with God are surfacing which is never easy. But the beauty of that is CCC is a place where I am surrounded by more love and grace than anywhere else. I was reminded this past week about the reasons I love this ministry and it all comes down to one thing: connections.
I know what you are thinking, the word is in the name of our ministry, of course that is an important part of CCC. But really, I am still being blown away by how blessed my heart is by relationships I have built through CCC. These connections are exactly what are helping me define what CCC really means to me.
CCC is sitting in the home of a woman who is going through chemotherapy whose daughter is her primary care-taker. Her diminished strength and constant pain have left her feeling weak, but the true pain lies in the fact that her loss of hair has left her feeling that she is not beautiful. CCC is about sitting in her living room, simply to talk to her and remind her that she is loved and absolutely beautiful.
CCC is watching a precious six-year old boy with muscular dystrophy get to walk out of his house and play in his yard, a miracle that was made possible by a wheelchair ramp being built. It is seeing the potential he has to grow and flourish because his grandmother loves him unconditionally. It is being blessed by the simple gift of his childish joy and vivacity for life.
CCC is having the person you have always looked up to as your second dad be your camper for the first time at the same camp where he brought you to camp for the first six years ago. It is seeing that his passion for a ministry has forever changed your life and how you see God.
CCC is walking through real life with your brothers and sisters in Christ, not just the light and happy times, but the heavy, painful realities of life. It is loving each other despite our flaws and despite our different backgrounds because Christ binds our hearts together as He pours out His grace on us.
CCC is even crying in your car because you are just so overwhelmed by the day-to-day stresses of life because you know that you can call your dad and let him carry your burdens with you.
CCC is experiencing life together with a community of faith as you learn what it looks like to seek Him with passion. It is sharing laughter, pain, frustration, joy, and every emotion in between with a community that will embrace you with grace and love.
See, CCC is all about the connections, and even more, it is all about the God who makes these connections possible. It is about a God who is faithful despite my unfaithfulness, consistent despite my inconsistency, and graceful despite my limitations and shortcomings. CCC is journeying through life with others and experiencing His love in new and amazing ways no matter how messy that looks sometimes.
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