Living Communally
Wow - it sure has been awhile since I wrote any kind of blog post. Right before I moved to Florida to start my appointment at my church was my last post. And to say life has been busy since then would be a huge understatement. Between moving to Florida, Shane and I both starting new jobs, writing sermons every week, trying to get settled in a new town, and meeting lots of new people, life has been full of a lot of new things. As you might imagine, all of this transition and adjustment makes life feel quite hectic.
Life lately has been a bit like running on a treadmill that is set at a pace that is just a little too fast for you. The feeling where you are running and somehow hanging on - you want to slow it down a notch or two, but you're worried that if you take any attention off running for dear life you might just get thrown off the back or faceplant. Kind of like this:
via GIPHY
Luckily, I have been able to keep up with the chaotic pace of day-to-day life so far. And the good news in all of it is that I am enjoying life in ministry. Even though it can be stressful and at times overwhelming, it is such a gift to be able to serve alongside the wonderful people at my church. Soon after I started at my church, one of my ladies asked me, "So, how do you like your congregation of grandparents?" And of course, I said love it! I love all my sweet old men and women, even if there are times when I want to wrap a couple of them (the ones in their 90s...) in bubble wrap and tell them to be very very careful.
But as much as I love all the people in my church, there are still challenges that come with being such a young pastor in an aging congregation. Having grown up in the church, I have developed some of my closest friendships with people I met at church or youth group. At my church now though, we don't really have any young adults in our congregation. And the same can be said of Shane's church. This makes it hard for Shane and I to find friendships with other people our age. And it's not that I don't LOVE my people, because I do, so much that it scares me sometimes.
What I am noticing is that my soul is thirsty. My soul is thirsty for the type of community and support system I had in seminary. I still have those precious friends, and we keep in touch regularly through texting and social media. But living in a new place without the built-in socialization of school and classes means that I often stick with just staying at home and hanging out with Shane. Both of us can tend to retreat into our little "bubble," a choice that is made easier based on how tired we typically are by the end of the day.
The author of mY generation: A Real Journey of Change and Hope is Josh Riebock, and he captures how I have been feeling lately so well. Here is what he writes in his chapter entitled "Wetlands":
Right now I am still looking for these things. And I have to make a concious choice again and again to try to live communally. But I'm trying. And I guess that is all I can really do.
Life lately has been a bit like running on a treadmill that is set at a pace that is just a little too fast for you. The feeling where you are running and somehow hanging on - you want to slow it down a notch or two, but you're worried that if you take any attention off running for dear life you might just get thrown off the back or faceplant. Kind of like this:
via GIPHY
Luckily, I have been able to keep up with the chaotic pace of day-to-day life so far. And the good news in all of it is that I am enjoying life in ministry. Even though it can be stressful and at times overwhelming, it is such a gift to be able to serve alongside the wonderful people at my church. Soon after I started at my church, one of my ladies asked me, "So, how do you like your congregation of grandparents?" And of course, I said love it! I love all my sweet old men and women, even if there are times when I want to wrap a couple of them (the ones in their 90s...) in bubble wrap and tell them to be very very careful.
But as much as I love all the people in my church, there are still challenges that come with being such a young pastor in an aging congregation. Having grown up in the church, I have developed some of my closest friendships with people I met at church or youth group. At my church now though, we don't really have any young adults in our congregation. And the same can be said of Shane's church. This makes it hard for Shane and I to find friendships with other people our age. And it's not that I don't LOVE my people, because I do, so much that it scares me sometimes.
What I am noticing is that my soul is thirsty. My soul is thirsty for the type of community and support system I had in seminary. I still have those precious friends, and we keep in touch regularly through texting and social media. But living in a new place without the built-in socialization of school and classes means that I often stick with just staying at home and hanging out with Shane. Both of us can tend to retreat into our little "bubble," a choice that is made easier based on how tired we typically are by the end of the day.
The author of mY generation: A Real Journey of Change and Hope is Josh Riebock, and he captures how I have been feeling lately so well. Here is what he writes in his chapter entitled "Wetlands":
For days at a time, I can be alone, which to an extent is good and part of who I am. It gives me space to think, create, and rest. But once I retreat too far into my reclusive world, I am smacked with repurcussions, and so is everyone else. I get grumpy, distant, and insecure. I question whether or not people care about me. My creative flow is squelched, and I become susceptible to fears and temptations that otherwise wouldn't exist. A weird kind of paranoia sets in. If I stay in my cave too long, my heart inevitably, like the falling of leaves of autumn, begins to dry up.
My soul, as introverted as it might be, needs other people to stay hydrated. For my heart to breathe, I have to make a concious choice to live communally, and I'm trying.So, I guess this whole post has been about me trying to process through my transition out of the seminary bubble into life in ministry. Ministry is great, and such a blessing, but it is also hard. It is challenging to love and lead my precious congregation. It stretches me in new ways, and forces me to grow each and every day. And as I'm rounding the corner into my fourth month, I am reminded of my deep need to live communally. I am reminded that my soul needs other people to stay hydrated. I am reminded that I need non-ministry/church friendships to allow my heart to breathe.
Right now I am still looking for these things. And I have to make a concious choice again and again to try to live communally. But I'm trying. And I guess that is all I can really do.
via GIPHY
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