Country Roads
My college roommate got married this weekend on Father's Day, which meant that Shane and I got to road-trip to Lincolnton for the wedding. While this trip involved yet another cross-state trip of being in the car for several hours and spending the night at a hotel, it was such a blessing. Virginia and I lived together at Appalachian for all 4 years of school. Somehow we made it through the awkwardness of being homesick, unsure freshman all the way to both graduating and continuing to pursue our dreams. Though Virginia is probably one of the happiest, most bubbly people I know, I never saw her glow the way she did after she started dating Sean. Their wedding was absolutely beautiful and it was great to see Virginia again and some other App friends.
One of the best parts about the weekend was that, since the wedding was in Lincolnton, I got to show Shane around the town before we headed back to Durham. I was on staff for two summers with Carolina Cross Connection, both at Loy White, so Cleveland, Lincoln, and Gaston counties will always be a home away from home for me. Since I have been living in Atlanta for three years, it was so refreshing to be on back, country roads with only two lanes and minimal traffic. Pointing out things to Shane as we rode down Highway 27 was a trip down memory lane for me.
I got to point out City Lunch (which I called shitty lunch accidentally once on a sleepy Saturday of paperwork wrapping up a camp week...but in light of the $3 hot dog and chili burger combo deal, that name wasn't too far from the truth). I tried to explain what "Cat Square" was and why that merited all the signs and hype around town. Basically summed it up with, "these are the things that are cool and exciting when you live in a small town."
As we left Lincolnton and continued on 27 towards Redbone Willy's, I was reminded of drives back into camp while trying to write directions on fam sheets from my GPS. I thought back to warm summer nights riding in Sheila the Jeep with my staff sisters while blasting "Cowboy Take Me Away." I thought of first visits where I fell in love with some of the most amazing individuals and families that so many people ignored or undervalued.
It's funny how something as simple as a road lined with fields can bring back such a rush of memories. My summers at Loy White were full even if they were exhausting and trying at times. I am grateful for all that those summers taught me about myself and my faith. I learned some hard lessons to be sure - about grief, conflict, forgiveness, grace, and so many other things. The country roads running from Loy White into Lincolnton were like medicine for my soul. Life has been busy and chaotic since the beginning of May, and things are not going to slow down much anytime soon.
In a week Shane and I move down to Florida and our first Sunday's at our new churches is July 2. And while I am excited about this new adventure, I am also super nervous about leaving the seminary community I have come to know and love over the past three years. Our trip to Lincolnton came at the perfect time because I needed to be reminded of the community that played such a huge role in cultivating my call to ministry.
I needed to be reminded of hard conversations when my friend and director told me that I was doing my job well, but I didn't know how to let people love me. I needed to remember all she and my other staff did that summer to teach me about grace and love that is stronger than my stubbornness. I needed to remember my staff holding me up when I found out that a member of my youth group died in the middle of a camp. I needed to remember them playing "Count on Me" by Bruno Mars and praying for me, showing me with their words and actions that they were there for me and were going to hold me up in my weakness that week. I needed to remember getting to fish hook my church daddy's and youth group when I was on staff, and what it was like to share a piece of my testimony with them. I needed to remember having someone lend me their shoulder on afternoons spent crying on the couch in a condemned trailer because things just felt overwhelming.
I needed to remember all of these things because I needed to remember that, no matter what happens on this new journey, I won't be alone. Just like all of those days and nights spent driving on country roads to and from camp, I will have people around me who love me and are there for me no matter what. There will inevitably be times when things go wrong, or life is stressful, or even when I just feel tired and overwhelmed. In those moments, I will cling to the lessons I learned on those country roads in the middle of NC. And I pray, that just like they did those summers a few years ago, those country roads will take me back to the grace that I desperately need but will struggle to accept.
On my hardest days of this new season, I hope I can remember the same words played to me riding to the store my first summer on staff: "It seems that all my bridges have been burnt. But you say that's exactly how this grace thing works."
Thank God for country roads that take me back to so many precious memories of grace becoming real to me in a new way. Here's to continuing to look for country roads that can point me back to grace when life gets hard.
One of the best parts about the weekend was that, since the wedding was in Lincolnton, I got to show Shane around the town before we headed back to Durham. I was on staff for two summers with Carolina Cross Connection, both at Loy White, so Cleveland, Lincoln, and Gaston counties will always be a home away from home for me. Since I have been living in Atlanta for three years, it was so refreshing to be on back, country roads with only two lanes and minimal traffic. Pointing out things to Shane as we rode down Highway 27 was a trip down memory lane for me.
I got to point out City Lunch (which I called shitty lunch accidentally once on a sleepy Saturday of paperwork wrapping up a camp week...but in light of the $3 hot dog and chili burger combo deal, that name wasn't too far from the truth). I tried to explain what "Cat Square" was and why that merited all the signs and hype around town. Basically summed it up with, "these are the things that are cool and exciting when you live in a small town."
As we left Lincolnton and continued on 27 towards Redbone Willy's, I was reminded of drives back into camp while trying to write directions on fam sheets from my GPS. I thought back to warm summer nights riding in Sheila the Jeep with my staff sisters while blasting "Cowboy Take Me Away." I thought of first visits where I fell in love with some of the most amazing individuals and families that so many people ignored or undervalued.
It's funny how something as simple as a road lined with fields can bring back such a rush of memories. My summers at Loy White were full even if they were exhausting and trying at times. I am grateful for all that those summers taught me about myself and my faith. I learned some hard lessons to be sure - about grief, conflict, forgiveness, grace, and so many other things. The country roads running from Loy White into Lincolnton were like medicine for my soul. Life has been busy and chaotic since the beginning of May, and things are not going to slow down much anytime soon.
In a week Shane and I move down to Florida and our first Sunday's at our new churches is July 2. And while I am excited about this new adventure, I am also super nervous about leaving the seminary community I have come to know and love over the past three years. Our trip to Lincolnton came at the perfect time because I needed to be reminded of the community that played such a huge role in cultivating my call to ministry.
I needed to remember all of these things because I needed to remember that, no matter what happens on this new journey, I won't be alone. Just like all of those days and nights spent driving on country roads to and from camp, I will have people around me who love me and are there for me no matter what. There will inevitably be times when things go wrong, or life is stressful, or even when I just feel tired and overwhelmed. In those moments, I will cling to the lessons I learned on those country roads in the middle of NC. And I pray, that just like they did those summers a few years ago, those country roads will take me back to the grace that I desperately need but will struggle to accept.
On my hardest days of this new season, I hope I can remember the same words played to me riding to the store my first summer on staff: "It seems that all my bridges have been burnt. But you say that's exactly how this grace thing works."
Thank God for country roads that take me back to so many precious memories of grace becoming real to me in a new way. Here's to continuing to look for country roads that can point me back to grace when life gets hard.
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